IT WAS NEVER ENOUGH

On that cold winter morning, Seventy years old Maria is lying on a bed in a hospital in New Brunswick, looking outside the only window of that silent room. It’s almost Christmas, she thought, trying to remember the last Christmas when she was the happiest 50 years ago. What went wrong, she thought to herself. Why doesn’t she have everything she has ever wanted? Even after becoming the CEO of the multi-million dollar company she once joined as an intern. Why is she alone up there lying in the best room of the best hospital in the country, having the best services, still very, very lonely…

Hey there, It’s Iris,
Have you ever felt that I will be happy in a moment that you are yet to achieve, and when you get there, you are not satisfied because you look forward to something else that you need to succeed?
Most of us have been there or maybe still in life where nothing is good enough. We work hard and keep working hard to get something that we want from life, a zeal that keeps us going to go somewhere, and we don’t know where but somewhere. Feeling that way is like you are halfway there, but when it starts affecting your mental peace and becomes a toxic habit, it is when you need to stop before it’s too late.
Getting too worked up and thinking you will get everything in life someday is easy and a common problem as all of us have become a part of that rat race, but what you don’t realize is all you are missing by not enjoying the process of getting up there. In most cases, you learn more than the end goal in the process itself, and it’s beautiful. It makes you grow, learn, evolve, and be something more than you ever thought you could be, and if you think about it, then that something is something you someday wished to be.

Maria remembered when she was 20 years old young intern who had just entered the business, who knew how to live life and wasn’t running the race yet.
She has one of her biggest regrets even after having everything because, for her, all her life.. it was never enough.
She enjoyed Christmas eve with her family and friends, friends who got lost in these years, and family with whom she hardly spent time.
After getting up there, probably during her last hours, she regrets not enjoying her life process. Getting too worked up and burned out to get something that has never been what her life was all about—missing out on the opportunities to enjoy what she has achieved. She does not look back to see how far she has come to give the appreciation she deserves, the time and luxury she deserves; instead look ahead to get what she doesn’t have all the time.

I watched a video on youtube a few days ago which talked about what people regretted the most in their life when they were taking their last breaths, and most of them said they regretted working too hard.
They say that excess of anything is harmful, even if that’s working hard. Having a balance in life is all one must aspire for. I mean, nothing can be your entire life. It will always be a part of your life. Imagine your life like a salad; excess or less of something will affect that salad’s whole texture, taste, and properties, making it something it is not supposed to be. A balance of proteins, carbs, fats, and everything else is essential to make your salad healthy. Likewise, having a bit of everything in your life is necessary to live it honestly.
I know that if you are a workaholic, then it feels almost impossible to stop. It’s like, you feed on your work and have some fire burn inside you all the time to do something great in life, and it’s good till this fire knows where to stop and set priorities right. But if you forget to stop, this will soon become an addiction, and you will look back, not enjoying life as much as you could have. I don’t know if you get it today, but trust me, it will hit like a rock of regret that time because you will always want more and will never be satisfied with what you have in life.

Throughout my life, I’ve learned that nothing you once wanted will be yours today, and maybe you want something that you might not want or will not get tomorrow.

Tomorrow and yesterday are not in our hands. What is in our hands is today, and it’s a healthy habit to think of today because nothing is predictable. Even after you work so damn hard, what are the possibilities you will get through and achieve what you want? That is when you will regret not living as much as you could have. I know it sounds demotivating, but that’s a fact we should accept to live healthier and happier lives.
So, The next time you overthink about a tomorrow that might never come,

Leave your devices and sit on that chair in the garden to soak up the sun.
And Remind yourself,
That it was never enough.